How Small Moments Build a More Equal Future

You know that mix of pride and a slight sense of panic you get when your kid pulls a bold move, something that challenges the norm? That was me the other day.

There I was, enjoying a rare moment of peace outside, when my daughter suddenly locked eyes on some neighbourhood kids playing hockey. They were older, bigger, and had that swagger of mini NHL stars who’d earned their stripes with every scraped knee.

What does my fearless daughter do? She sizes them up, runs to our garage, and emerges wielding her hockey stick, as if she’s holding the golden ticket to their game. Before I can say, “Sweetheart, maybe say hi first?” she’s right there with the boys, smack in the middle of their game.

The boys’ reactions were priceless. There was a moment of stunned silence, but then, like the gentlemen they are, they paused their game, took her under their wing, and started showing her some drills. I stood there, brimming with pride, joy, a bit of fear, but mostly awe at my daughter’s boldness—because in that moment, she wasn’t just playing a game; she was breaking down a barrier. I think we all had that kind of unshakeable confidence once. But somewhere along the line, most of us let it slip through our fingers. Watching her, I felt this fierce determination to protect that confidence, to make sure it doesn’t get snuffed out by the world’s expectations.

Let’s be clear, my daughter has absolutely no idea how to play hockey. I’m not even sure she knows what a puck is. But none of that mattered to her. She didn’t see age, skill, or gender. She just saw a group of kids having fun, and she wanted in. It was a simple moment, but it reminded me of the confidence children naturally have before the world teaches them to lose it. As they grow, society begins to impose its expectations, and that’s when the real challenge begins. It’s our job to protect and nurture that innate confidence, to make sure it doesn’t fade as they start to notice the barriers the world puts up.

This moment reminded me that equality isn’t about having the same abilities or experiences. It’s about having the guts to seize opportunities and the confidence to make them yours.

As a parent, this got me thinking. How often do we, as adults, hold back because we don’t feel skilled enough, experienced enough, or like we belong? More importantly, how can we, as parents, keep that sense of equality and fearless confidence alive in our kids? Here’s what I’ve been thinking:

Flip the Script. When you child says, “I can’t,” respond with “Yet.” Teach them to add that little word at the end of their sentences; “I can’t…yet.” It shifts the way they think and suddenly, the impossible feels temporary.
Challenge Stereotypes Early. Gender stereotypes are everywhere, creeping into our kids’ lies from a young age. By encouraging our kids to engage in activities traditionally dominated by the opposite gender, we can help break those stereotypes. My kid didn’t see hockey as a “boys’ sport.” She saw it as a fun game she wanted to play.
Model Confidence. Kids watch us like hawks. When they see us stepping out of our comfort zones, trying new things, and treating everyone as equals, they’ll likely follow suit. It’s not always easy but showing them what onfidence looks like gives them a blueprint to follow.
Let Them Lead. Involve your kid in decisions that matter to them–big or small. Whether it’s planning a weekend adventure or picking the next skill to learn, giving hem a voice shows that their opinions and choices matter.
Encourage Friendly Rebellion. Teach your kids to respectfully question the status quo. If something doesn’t sit right, urge them to speak up, ask questions, or challenge a rule (with valid reason). This nurtures a sense of agency and self-worth.
Spotlight Their Superpowers. Regularly point out what makes your kid unique–whether it’s their knack for solving puzzles, their empathy, or their creativity. Frame these as “superpowers” that they can use to navigate the world with confidence and impact.

Gender equality is a hot topic. But let’s face it, while we’ve come a long way, we’re still ironing out the kinks. Sure, we’re seeing more women in STEM and more men in caregiving roles, but those old stereotypes are still hanging on, making things more complicated than they need to be.

The real challenge isn’t just about making sure girls have the same opportunities as boys. It’s about creating a world where every kid feels free to explore their interests, regardless of what society says they should or shouldn’t do. It’s about kids seeing the world as full of open doors, not barriers based on gender.

That’s why moments like my daughter jumping into that hockey game are so important. When she grabbed that stick and joined in, she wasn’t just playing a sport–she was challenging a norm without even realizing it. And when those boys made room for her, they were doing their part to push equality forward, even if they didn’t know it.

As parents, it’s our job to keep this momentum going. By modelling confidence, challenging stereotypes early, and making sure every kid feels valued and capable, we can help shape a future where gender is just a detail, not a defining factor.

So, the next time your kid wants to try something new–whether it’s a ‘for boys’ or ‘for girls’–support them wholeheartedly. Because these small steps they take today are laying the groundwork for a more equal world tomorrow.

And isn’t that the whole point? To raise kids who don’t just fit into the landscape, but transform it–making every opportunity theirs, no matter the game?